'I was brainwashed by Andrew Tate at 12 like EastEnders' Joel - here's what parents need to do'

EastEnders viewers have watched as Albert Square teen Joel has been pulled further into the poisonous world of the Manosphere over the last few weeks, with the harrowing storyline coming to a head tonight. After becoming brainwashed by the misogynistic ideology coming from online figures like Andrew Tate, Joel viciously attacks stepmother Vicky Fowler in this evening's dark episode.

The story is all too familiar for 15-year-old Josh Sargent - who was influenced by Tate himself and the Manosphere ideology at the age of 12. Luckily, Josh came out the other side and while his case was never as extreme as EastEnders character Joel's, he's speaking out about how to put a stop to toxic masculinity spreading among his peers.

"Boys as young as 12 and 13 are being told that in order to have any success in relationships, you have to be a strong, rich, attractive, masculine man," he tells The Mirror. "I was especially susceptible to this.

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"Fitting into this tight box of what masculinity was that isn't really compatible with society nowadays in order to be seen and loved in society."

Like Joel on the BBC soap, Josh was influenced by videos that came up in his social media algorithm by Tate, who promotes the belief that society is biased against men due to feminism's influence on society. "The impact it had on me personally and has on young boys is quite multifaceted," he explains.

"The first thing that changes is your attitude towards traditional institutions - you're being taught that the education system is a scam to feed you into a race race that funds the ambition of the elite," he adds. "But there's an influencer who's going to save you from that."

The Manosphere influencers refer to this as breaking out of the Matrix - taken from the 1999 sci-fi film. "It's like breaking out of the societal trap and becoming one of those elites at the top of society. It makes you feel quite powerful because you believe you have the ability to break out of the system that you've been told exists."

As seen on EastEnders, boys' attitudes towards relationships and women also changes when under the influence of these misogynistic figures. "There's a rule that's commonly propagated called the 80-20 rule - that 80% of women are attracted to the top 20% of men. It's complete BS but it's so commonly pushed out," he says.

"You get this weird dichotomy of getting power from feeling like you can escape the system and become at the top of society and then also the vulnerability and insecurity by feeling you're not there because you're not good enough."

After two years, Josh began to question the ideology peddled by influencers like Tate when he realised that they weren't actually helping boys succeed, despite showing off their flashy cars and jewellery. "If the boys watching those influencers really did succeed - if they got rich and in great shape and got the girlfriend of their dreams - they would have no need for those influencers anymore," he says.

"Those influencers will only succeed when the people watching them don't succeed which I started thinking about. I was thinking, 'Okay, I don't think these influencers are actually on my side.'"

As for how stories like these are portrayed in the media, Josh says that EastEnders' storyline with Joel "strikes the perfect balance" between being dramatic and being realistic. However, he stresses that TV shows should not villainise the boys wrapped up in the Manosphere ideology - which Netflix hit Adolescence could be interpreted as doing.

"Adolescence was an incredible storyline that got lots of attention for the issue and TV shows like that are the reason I'm able to have these conversations about the topic. It's a massive positive," he says.

"At the same time, it is very easy to take the wrong message from fictional shows like that - they often depict very violent, misogynistic acts through teenage boys. Adolescence was the murder, Joel was punching his step-mum - very violent, very dramatic.

"If it's taken as this is how content is impacting young boys and we should be open and honest to prevent it from getting to that point, that's a good takeaway. But a lot of the takeaway I've seen online is young boys are dangerous - they can end up being stigmatised."

He adds that Adolescence should not be shown in classrooms, as Prime Minister Keir Starmer originally suggested, because of this. "With that sensationalist approach, there has to be the balance of realism . We shouldn't be focusing on stigmatising boys but rather having open, honest conversations to prevent it even getting to that point in the first place."

It's open and honest conversations that Josh suggests parents should be having with their kids if they spot the warnings signs - which are growing distrust in the education system and subtle misogynistic comments about women. "There was a scene with Joel in EastEnders where he suggests that women are submissive to men," Josh gives as an example.

However, parents should tread carefully. "If parents rush into the situation thinking, 'Warning sign, warning sign, extremism,' it's easy for boys to go into fight-or-flight response and get confrontational about it which can push boys further towards the influencer," he warns.

"The way it's being framed to these young boys is that the institution is against you and that their role models are bad. I think the most impact comes from parents sitting down with their boys at the dinner table and just bringing up Andrew Tate, having an open, honest, non-judgemental conversation about it.

"Once parents start to try and understand the way these boys are thinking and the deeper level worries about society and themselves, their insecurities, that's where the most impact comes from."

Josh added that the government's focus to combat the problem should be to bring external speakers into schools. "People who aren't teaching staff and experts in having really difficult conversations about this," he says. "It's sort of outside the school environment which makes it less stigmatising and confrontational and makes boys more receptive.

"Meanwhile, what individual members of society can do is facilitate these conversations and just be open-minded. They can consume this media and campaigns around the Manosphere with the perspective that boys are not the enemy and we're working with them, not against them."

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